My little guy just began standing on his own today (or yesterday as I am posting this a little after midnight). It won’t be long before he’ll be walking. He’s 8.5 months old now. It’s been since December since I left Discovery Church as Associate Pastor. I think it’s been since March when I left Olan Mills as a studio photographer with them. I really can’t remember. This dad thing makes everything run together. Timelines become a blur of feedings, diaper changes, cuddles and naps.
I will tell you about my favorite activities with Aidan so far though.
#1. The Supervised Freecrawl.
This little activity basically revolves around Aidan crawling and rolling around on the floor while I chase after him and keep him from the things that he otherwise would get into and possibly hurt himself with. Most of this is letting him crawl to a certain point and then I come over and pick him up and turn him the other way. He then crawls till he runs out of space and I chase him down and turn him again. Apparently it’s a real crowd pleaser with the cats who immediately go to sleep watching this apparently crazy owner of theirs expend so much energy chasing after his spawn. I did add a new variation to this little activity today though. I put Aidan in a hooded sweatshirt and put my ipod touch in his hood while it played music. It soon became a twirling baby on the floor as he wriggled around in circles looking for the source of the music.
#2. The Shaggy Dad Mall Walk / Aidan Flirts With All the Girls.
I am trying to lose weight right now. It’s part of a grand plan of actually being able to keep up with a growing boy in the next few years. This means that when I can get out and go for a walk with Aidan, I try to. For some reason walking around the neighborhood pushing a stroller seems odd to a guy, at least me, so I try to go to the mall and walk around there. At least there I can duck into the bookstore and even if I am walking around, everyone assumes I am waiting for my wife to come out of a clothing store. It’s a nice deal especially since they have Air Conditioning. Now Aidan is a cute child as you can see from the videos. I get people from all walks of life who comment about how cute he is. I do try to discourage certain people from getting a little too close to my child though. More on that Later. Well, Aidan is all the rage with girls aged one through ninety-eight. You can’t tell me that a woman isn’t wired differently from a guy. Put a cute baby nearby and it comes out. Aidan loves the attention though. He’s already figured out that a girl or woman is fifteen times more likely to smile at him or talk to him than any guy. You can bet that he takes advantage of it too! He is all smiles when we go to the mall. I’ve stood surrounded in public places while people ooh and ahh over him, seriously it’s that bad on occasion.
Now when my wife isn’t able to go with me as many time she isn’t, I have a secret weapon that I use to keep the double digit x chromosomes from swarming my child. I wear a hat, headphones and listen to my ipod. I don’t shave and make sure that I look like I just crawled out of bed. Right now, since I am in the middle of a job hunt, I have let my hair grow out a little longer. I’ll cut it before any serious personal interviews, but this shaggy-headed, unshaven and hat-wearing guy (who is distancing himself even of the sounds around him by listening to his ipod) does a lot to stave off those who would otherwise comment on my infant child in some way. Aidan still tries to draw their attention though. He giggles, squeals, and sometimes even laughs hysterically when he sees someone who he thinks would give him some attention walks his way.
Now, I told you that there were certain people I heavily discourage from getting too close to my child. I have nothing again certain, well… stereotypes, but there are people who make my skin crawl at the way they seem to stalk babies. Here is a few of the people I try to avoid when I am out with my little one.
Waitresses – They don’t usually do too bad, but I’ve had a few that wanted to hang around while we ate and talk about Aidan… in detail. Most often, they are wanting to share cell phone pictures of their little dumplings at home. It really cracks me up when a waitress uses a food-based name to refer to a child. “Honey” isn’t too bad, but if they start referring to a kid as “dumpling” or “cutie pie” or “small fry” I start getting a little uneasy.
Moms with an Entourage of Children in Tow- There is some really weird advice people give you when you have kids. These moms are the weirdest. They have seven kids ranging from fourteen to negative 2 days (meaning that she is getting ready to pop out one more) and they have advice. More than enough. They can tell you about natural cures for athletes foot or how to tell when your child is going to be sick more than a week in advance. They act like they have just won the cosmic lottery for being miserable and are sure you have too. Another thing that I think is funny is when these moms start fawning all over my child and say something like “Isn’t he just the cutest baby I ever saw?” This is where I look up and try to make eye contact with all of her brood one by one and laugh like a maniac on speed.
Wal-Mart Greeters and Employees - Maybe the greeter is assuming when I walk through those sliding glass doors that I am bringing the child back as an exchange and they want to put a smiley face sticker on his forehead and direct me to the service counter where the lady there can announce to the rest of the store the cuteness factor of my little one before I start the rounds to each of the departments where they all bestow blessings of “Have a nice day!” or tell me about their 19 kids and 6 grandchildren that live out in Omaha, except the littlest because he lived with his dad who got bit by a shark while swimming in the river drunk one night. I sometimes just wish I could write down all the crazy stories I hear at the magical “World of Wally”.
I know it’s going to be bad when I walk in the first doors and the person hobbles up off their chair throws their walker down and sprints about 40 feet to stand there and make sure that they get my little one’s attention when I get to the second set of doors. Sometimes, I take my time and act like I am picking the best cart out of the cart lines (and check all the wheels to make sure they roll freely to amp up the anticipation factor. Sometimes I just want to run in and try to make it past them before they get across the aisle. Here I know I’d lose cause they’d get me on the way out.
